One thing I think a lot of us treating special needs face is people thinking we’re over-reacting. It’s sad that people judge others at all, but I guess it’s human nature to form opinions about people and what they are doing.
Caring for a child with special needs is a tender topic, so it hurts even more when people judge us for it. Just when you need support, you get criticism. When you need help the most, people are saying you are blowing it out of proportion.
I’m sure many can relate to people saying nothing can be done to help the child, and the mother who works hard to improve her child’s life is just kidding herself. As moms, we put a lot of time and energy into our children’s care. Sometimes those you look to for support, have harmful things to say. It hurts to hear things like “Here she goes again” or “When I raised my children…”
It’s painful to hear these things, and accept the fact that these people will not be supporting you, but you aren’t alone. Most of us have dealt with people like this, and hearing other moms’ experiences may help discredit the criticisms and validate your love for your children. Support groups are a great place to check in once in a while and share those unbelievable stories, and laugh about them.
Your family may have been the first place you looked for support and the last place you found it. Be open to getting support from other people. I have been surprised to find friends who don’t face special needs often really GET IT, and are full of encouragement. Others don’t get the special needs, but totally get good parenting, and are very supportive.
Remember, the criticisms are not valid, because they come from a place of ignorance. If they are getting to you, talk to your support group or your child’s providers, and let them remind you of what a great job you are doing.